The Mixed Girl TAG

The Urban Retreat Beautique
Today I’ll be doing another tag-post: The Mixed Girl TAG…
I’ve seen a lot of you do this tag on your blogs and YouTube channels so as a fellow mixed girl I didn’t want to stay behind!1. What are you mixed with?
I’m mixed black (Surinamese) and white (Dutch).
mixed-girl-tag

2. What ethnicity have you often been mistaken for?
Here in Holland there are a lot of different cultures. People have asked me if I was from Cape Verde, Curacao, Dominican Republic…and even MOROCCO.

3. Is your hair curly or straight?
My hair is naturally curly and sort of looks like those old-school phone cords LoL
mixed-girl-tag
mixed-girl-tag

4. Was coming from different backgrounds challenging growing up?
My initial answer would be “No not really”….but when I really think back there were some difficult moments. As a teenager I felt like I didn’t belong anywhere. I was too dark skinned to fit in in the “white society”and too light skinned (with white people’s manners) to be accepted by some black people. As a teenager that’s not an easy position to be in since you are already struggling to create your own identity. So figuring out where you “belong”is a very difficult and emotional task.

5. Which backgrounds do you embrace the most?
I don’t know…I still don’t feel like I belong to either of my backgrounds. I think because I have been feeling like this for over 15 years I kinda just embrace “ME”. I figure being from two different backgrounds is what makes me who I am. I’m not more Dutch than I am Surinamese or vice versa…I’m Both…I’m Deborah…

6. Have you ever been teased for being different?
I have never really been teased except from the times my Dutch grandmother used to joke about my booty being “bigger than usual” and that I could put a serving tray on it….like REALLY?!?! smh
And some of my Surinamese friends/family used to call me a “Bounty” Chocolate Bar….brown on the outside but white on the inside…

7. Have you ever been ashamed of being multiracial?
No, I have never been ashamed. Though, I remember being sort of sad when I was about 4 or 5 years old that i had brown curly hair. I was so jealous of the girls in my class (or the Disney princesses) who had long, straight and golden hair. When I was playing I used to walk around with a scarf, towel or t-shirt on my head…pretending it was long, straight and golden hair and I would sweep it off my shoulder. It’s funny to see my 5 year old niece do the exact same thing.
But really though?! Why is that? Is this something all “black” little girls go through?!

8. Do you feel that being mixed has its benefits?
I do…it made me forced me to think about and figure out who I was at a very young age. It made me realize that it doesn’t matter where you come from or that you don’t have to BELONG to any background to feel totally and completely 100% human. It taught me that it doesn’t matter what color your partner is. You can have your preference of course, I mean I do too, but i would NEVER say stuff like “I will NEVER date a black man” or “That guy is TOO white for me”. Just be open to really getting to know someone and they might just surprise you! 🙂

9. What makes being multiracial a beautiful thing?
Having two different cultural histories and all the DIFFERENT stories your family members or people with the same backgrounds can tell you. My (Surinamese) aunt and I want to track our family history. Someone in our family found out that somewhere down the line a slave owner in Surinam had an affair with one of the the first women of our family that whas brought to there from Africa. They had children who automatically were born as free people.

My Dutch grandparents used to tell me all these stories about World War II and how they ate flower bulbs because there was hardly any food available.

So what makes being multiracial a beautiful thing: The different historical backgrounds…hands down!

10. Any advice to someone who struggles with their multiracial identity?
If you struggle with finding out who you are…stop worrying about having to “Label” yourself. Listen to the different stories people will tell you about your family’s histories. Let the stories sink in and remember that both histories led to you being born. You are UNIQUE, your own person… And don’t let anyone tell you “you’re not this  enough to belong to this background” or “you’re not that enough to be one of us”. Let ’em talk and just be your own unique self! You will have your own experiences that will make you into the person you will eventually become!

This tag was pretty personal and intense… which is allllll guuuddddd… I know some people find courage in reading these kind of tag posts and I’d be honored if my answers will help ANYone who is in that same situation I was in.

Remember, YOU ARE UNIQUE!!!!!!!

Are you from different cultural backgrounds too?

deborahsaysbeauty

BH Cosmetics Winter Makeup

Have you read these posts already?

0 Comments

  1. puddlesofinkk January 25, 2015

    This was so interesting to read 🙂 it’s made me want to do it now! Btw your mix is so cool – I’m jealous of your hair lol xx

    Reply
  2. myrebelliousheart January 25, 2015

    It’s always interesting to read the stories of other mixed race girls. Loved your post.

    Reply
  3. talesofthechair April 23, 2015

    Beautiful!!

    Reply
  4. lifeintheme May 5, 2015

    I never put a towel on my head, but I always lamented not having blonde princess hair. At least there are a few princesses of color nowadays for our nieces!

    Reply

Leave a Reply